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[Nov. 19th, 2009|03:44 am] |
i'm tired, i'm drinking a monster to stay awake so i can write this essay by tomorrow.
To be honest i should have started it earlier.. but i didn't.
It wasn't really laziness i just like to take care of the earlier class first and that was programming, so i didn't do any english.. Plus i had a test in Programming so that kind of settled that about which class i was going to spend more time working on.
And after enough time passes i'm kind of left all tired trying to get this shit done before the deadline.
Sooo Tired.. Fuck English. What's it ever done for me anyway? all they ever do is "Critique" my paper anyway. Just an excuse to insult my hard work, not like any of them write any better. I've read their papers, and they got the balls to complain about mine!
I guess this paper is going to be kind of half assed considering the time. I have to write it in, like 2 hours.. it'll be kinda hard..
I have to one up Hemingway somehow, even though i thought his paper was kind of aimless when i first read it. Apparently he writes in a way that you have to figure out what he's talking about. Now i have to write the sequal to a scene of some chick drinking a beer trying to decide whether she's going to get an abortion.
Apparently a few hundred years ago they hadn't realized babies and alcohol don't mix. Go figure.
I ran through the BUDK catalog, it's a knife catalog for anyone not in the know. Here's hoping the list of people i have to buy for the winter season doesn't increase, i'm already trying to figure out how many people i can buy shit for out of this thing. Hopefully save on shipping that way. Otherwise a $13 dollar gift jumped up to like a $20 gift, and there really isn't any more bang for your buck there. They're stuck with a $13 dollar gift and you could have gotten them the fancy $20 gift if you were there in person. So i suddenly feel all cheap for doing it so i like to get things in person.. Buuuut~
The magic of catalogs are hard to get over.. Plus i can order all this stuff and people just bring it right to the door.. how cool is that? And there's so much cool stuff in there, like this fancy knife that has like a skull on the handle and it looks like bones, but it separates into.. wait for it... That's right! 2 knives! It was 1 knife.. now 2. OOOoooOOh I want it but i never know when i'm going to make more money so i have to be careful.
Actually truth by told i want everything i see in the catalog. It's a good thing i didn't win the lottery or something i'd spend it all on cheap crap i see in catalogs random people send me. Hell i wanted to get a fancy rubber band thing that goes around a shotgun for holding extra shells.. then i realized i didn't have a shotgun. But if i had one! i would get one of those things.. it looks so cool...
I also need to work on a rubber array this weekend.. a magical array that "allocates" space before using it.. whatever the fuck that means.
I could make this thing, but i don't understand how to do it how the teacher wants me to do it, partly cause i have trouble following his directions. which is probably cause he makes up conditions in the middle of class.. and i don't tend to write them down cause i'm to busy writing down his examples.. bastard writes way to fast. I can't keep up.. but no one else complains.. so i just live with it :(
probably shouldn't though.. like 9/10 of the people in the class are going to drop out anyway, why should i care whether they have to listen to the same thing twice?
I'd rather be writing that array right now though.. Oh well, time to write that rough draft now that i got my brain working. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jul. 2nd, 2009|03:31 am] |
Got to washing my car and general maintenance, thought i'd put air in the tires and before i knew it i may have gotten a little out of hand >_>
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 20th, 2009|08:48 pm] |
ever close one eye when you look at your computer?
Everything sort of looks different. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 13th, 2009|06:12 am] |
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My organs hurt, damn energy drinks |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 13th, 2009|12:02 am] |
i made a new icon! can you tell? i bet it looks all professional huh?
It wasn't obvious at all.
But i like it, so fuck you. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 5th, 2009|03:17 pm] |
I'm BOOOORED~ not that there aren't things i can be doing or should be doing. But all i want to do is get wasted, sadly i have class in two hours and i don't think i could pass the test coming up while drunk.
Plus there's a bunch of school work i need to do for the class which will be impossible within the time i have.. but i haven't been working on it. I'm feeling very slow and lazy right now.. like devoid of energy so i'm going to run off and get an energy drink.
I wanted to have a drink earlier in the day but i got bitched out for considering a drink at 8:00 am.
Fucking cold had me over a barrel for two weeks and i hadn't had a drink for a week prior to that. No particular reason just been busy. So having a drink in the morning wouldn't have been that big of a deal.. ah well. |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 4th, 2009|09:22 pm] |
well, 11 hours since i started my homework. Took a few breaks so we'll call it 8 hours of time working on it. And now i get to start working on homework from me next class yay!
i swear if i don't go all full metal jacket with my notebook by the end of the night i'll be pretty surprised.
"This is my notebook. There are many like it but this one is mine. My notebook is my best friend. It is my life. I must master it as I must master my life. Without me, my notebook is useless. Without my notebook I am useless. .." |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 3rd, 2009|04:47 pm] |
well i've been sick and sleeping through when i generally would have my classes for the last few days. Now i need to stay awake through my classes so i've bought 2 Monster's and one of those 5 hour energy drinks.
It's only 5 hours so this should be overkill but i have a lot i need to make up with a deadline of about 2 days. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 28th, 2009|10:00 pm] |
| [ | music |
| | Flogging Molly - Black Friday | ] |
I just ate Gouda.. and it was goood-ah |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 27th, 2009|07:48 am] |
i had a dream of a person i hadn't seen in a very long time, sadly i had some music playing in the background and i started to wonder about it.. which fucking woke me up. My only real problem is now that i've woken up i'm not sure if i ever actually knew the person or i met them in another dream..
Kinda sucks, it's like trying to look up the year book picture of someone you find out never actually existed.. Damn nostalgia is shot.
Of course this time was just a dream anyway but it's nice seeing people you once knew even if your just walking around a memory.
Meh, dreams fade fast i'm sure i'll forget soon enough anyway. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 25th, 2009|10:46 am] |
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My life moves to slowly, i really gotta do something about that. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 24th, 2009|05:22 pm] |
sicky head, ouchie it hurts me so.
I woke up before class with a splitty headache. Fun Fun!! Anyway, i get to load up on the over the counter medication i stockpiled to get through class..
This is going to fucking suck. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 22nd, 2009|07:54 pm] |
Well third day into my cold/flu, no fever so i guess it would be a cold. I'm a little delirious, can't concentrate, congrested, sore throat, sore and i can't sleep.
When i do sleep i wake up in a miserable state.
Besides that, can't complain. |
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[Feb. 21st, 2009|06:41 pm] |
Well i watched Leaving Las Vegas, and i got to tell yah. It was pretty depressing, I was also told that Intervention would be good for making me feel better about myself.. A man died :(
I got past it though.. although very sad and depressing.
Anyway i got a question, when did drinking stop being about being merry?
Anyway after watching Leaving Las vegas i threw on Flogging Molly and it made the hurty feeling go away. "Wrong Company" Is worth listening to if anyone has never heard it before.
Anyway, anyone got anything that portrays drinking in a positive light? you know.. like where it should be.. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 19th, 2009|04:26 am] |
Can't sleep and i've run through every avenue of entertainment that has come to mind while hoping to fall asleep.. actually i've hit the point where i don't really care anymore.
But i'm going to switch to studyin' Still waiting to turn 21. I've been waiting since i was 11 and it'll be one of those mile markers in life that i think i can get excited over. I find fewer and fewer things worth being happy about. But hell working towards a goal is the second best thing to happiness... i suppose.
Meh i know what i could do to cheer myself up but i'd lose my goal doing it. Sometimes i wish i had become a mechanic or something, they get to jump start life with a steady pay check a hell of a lot faster.
It's not like the degree i'm going after is all that appreciated anyway.. All the damn work is being outsourced to India. Although who knows, maybe i'll be able to create some sort of scraper to taking stock's as they come out from some website or another and compile them into a graph and make some cash that way?
I don't know about web programming though.. I will in the future though, that's why i'm going to college.. among other things.. like a degree.. future.. White picket Fence, dog named todo.. wife.. 2.3 children.. a barbeque.. Hmm atleast that's what i thought i wanted. Seems like the older you get the more your goals sort of skew.. Meh maybe that's my shitty mood coming through. Only really get's to me when i'm having trouble sleeping so maybe that has something to do with it?
Like when something bad happens and you yell at someone that isn't related to the problem at all?
Hmm so Old Goal List:
21: Drink
Graduate: find a career
Woman: Find one
Marriage: Do it
Children: Make them
Grim Reaper: Meet them
Now for the New List:
Job: get one << god i suck.. I'll do it though i'm not worried.
21: Drink << yay nothing changed there?
Autocross: Yeaaah Booyyyiieee
Mkay now for my ongoing life list.. which i've had since i tried to commit suicide that one time. It gave me a reason to live. Basically i've been adding things and taking things off since.. well a long time ago.
Speeding
Sky Diving
Fight a Bear << i'm thinking a suit of armour.
Make a Couch out of Beer cans and Pizza Boxes
Eat Whale Sushi
Join Autocross
Take a Spirit Journey
Play Airsoft in the Woods with many friends
Outdoor Barbeque.. like midnight or something? that'd be fun.. full moon?
~~~~ It's need a lot of light even with the moon but it'd be fun
Speed while being an Old man
Make fun of children as an old man.. << don't judge me
Blow Shit up
Drive Fast
Get good with Computers.
Get really good with Computers
Become a wizard with a computer.
Get a Motorcycle
Take Care of my Family
Become a Millionaire.. << i've disappointed myself with this one.. apparently, not easy.
Own an Island
Go to a Cockfight.. you know roosters?
Meh, that's all i can think of at the moment, although I generally don't write down my list this is it's current state.
I've actually done about half the lists length worth of goals already, i probably should have made a check list so i could see the things i've accomplished.
Dream:
Wife
Children
Degree in computer Science
Not necessarily in order. Hmm i guess i still want those things.. go figure. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 10th, 2009|02:40 pm] |
Well i added someone to my "myspace" friends whom i haven't seen in 5 years or so. It was a woman and i loved her at one time. In fact it made what i have felt for every woman before or after feel completely insignificant.
She's married and has a kid, and i'm fucking depressed. The worst part is knowing it's my own damn fault, i never made my feelings clear and then she moved away. You always hope you can hook up with the one that got away but then this shit happens.. fuck i'm sad.
I'm just going to crawl into a corner or something. It also made me aware of how much i'm lacking in the life department, seems like everyone i knew has passed me by while i've been doing the whole "college" thing. It doesn't have to occupy as much time as it does.. i could have a life yah know?
Another thing i'm completely at fault for. There was so much more i could have done if i knew i'd be where i am today if i hadn't.
God this feeling isn't going to go away anytime soon. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 10th, 2009|05:09 am] |
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3 hours past nap time and i got a test tomorrow, yay? |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 6th, 2009|03:31 am] |
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I figured i'd be a millionaire by now.. life never ends up how you would expect. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 3rd, 2009|03:49 am] |
Must Sleeeep~ MUUUST SLEEEEP...
not working.
shit. |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 31st, 2009|03:13 am] |
Well.. i got the Insomnia again [ Error: Irreparable invalid markup ('<_<>') in entry. Owner must fix manually. Raw contents below.] Well.. i got the Insomnia again <_< . . . >_>...shit.
I was planning on going fishing tomorrow to. Worked out, had a good dinner. good day in general. But no sleepy..
I hate insomnia with a fiery passion. |
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